A Message to My Boys

Family vacation!  On balance it was very fun, but it is always interesting to experience your own family's particular brand of insanity.  There is a lot of love trapped inside of that insanity.  As I left my parents broken and exhausted at 4:30 a.m. in the Ft. Myers airport (or, more precisely, they left me... with my cell phone in their backseat) I had occasion to wonder what our contribution was to that insanity.  It is hard to turn the mirror on yourself sometimes. For example, I took the boys putt-putting, which is always a hugely popular activity.  It is Dad of the year type stuff, I think.  This year they were pretty fired up after their success in December in Florida.  As we headed out, Hunt was talking trash to Sam about his 2 holes-in-one at the "Animal" course in December, which is never received well by my extremely competitive high-strung 8 year old who had only 1 hole-in-one (and attempted to break a putt-putt putter in two during the event - Imagine J

"[He] deified the All and Life in order to find peace and happiness in the face of it" - Nietzsche on Baruch Spinoza A few things have happened that have prompted this blog.  First, I am recently separated and soon to be divorced (not of my choosing).  Second, I started to get asked the question "how are you doing?" a lot.  I can always muster a "fine" or "its tough, but I'm doing ok", but the words always feel trite.  There is no way a word or a phrase can accurately capture the pain, sadness, hurt, and loss that you feel on the wrong side of a divorce. I am sure there are more than a few people who enter marriage with some baggage.  I certainly did, and to be fair, I don't blame my ex for leaving me and my suitcases behind.  However, it is way to simple to say I am able to just shrug my shoulders and say "I get it" and move on.  I understand why she did what she did, and I don't blame her.  It doesn't mean there